[. . . ah. . . with everything that has happened this week, with how exhausted and beaten down and downtrodden Catra is. . . with how often she has relied on Adora to lift her up again, to be there when she needed her, to give her a shoulder to lean on and a hand in her hair coaxing her to sleep. . .]
[finally, there seems to be something Catra can do in return]
[she scoots a little closer to Adora, close enough that her tail brushes up against Adora's back]
You protected me. And not-- I don't mean when you fought off Horde Prime's ships.
[... What does she mean. Adora blinks, and again, slowly tilting her head as she looks at Catra. She's fine--happy even--with Catra scooting closer, but it's plain she does not understand what she means.]
[her cheeks are super super red as she struggles for the words, trying her best not to let her fluster get the best of her]
I mean-- you know. Like. . . [WORDS, CATRA. USE THEM] I've done a lot of stuff I'm not. . . [a pause] I hurt a lot of people. I hurt you. I can't run from that, and I promise I'm not going to try.
But you still never gave up on me.
[her fingers curl into the fabric of her leggings]
If you had, I don't know where I'd be right now. So it's just. . .
[... Adora's pretty sure that her heart has never felt so full in her life, which is so unfair, isn't it? People are dying, they need to get home, Etheria needs them... but here and now, in this moment, she feels happy.
Catra's words are soft and stilted and stammering, but they're honest, her honest feelings, and there's something in Adora's heart that beats extra to that, and a swooping feeling in her stomach that she knows by now means trouble.
She closes her eyes, smiling a little despite herself, and thinks it isn't fair that she's so happy right now, when she doesn't deserve to be. When she hasn't really protected Catra here at all.]
... I'll never, ever give up on you, Catra. That... even if I can't do anything else here, I can promise you that.
You're too important to me. I can't--I don't want to imagine life without you.
[which is part of the reason Catra is trying to convey this in the first place, honestly. so. . . Adora doesn't feel like she failed her. that she isn't protecting her. that she isn't useful without She-ra]
[-- but there is a moment where she's distracted by those words, that promise, that assertion of her importance to Adora, despite everything that's happened. there's a moment where she lifts her gaze, eyes locking with Adora's, taking in those soft features and the curve of that smile and the brightness of that expression]
[she could let herself get lost in it, if she truly wanted to. that fierce gaze that never, ever loses its fire, no matter how difficult things may seem]
[. . .]
[but. . . not now!! that's not for now. she has a mission!!]
What I'm saying is, you don't have to be She-ra to protect people, okay? So.
[... Ah. And just like that... Adora's expression falters a little, and so does the moment. It's a nice thought, that she doesn't have to be She-ra to protect people. But she knows the truth.
She, Adora, can only do so much. Without She-ra, she's just an ordinary girl who's not very good at a lot of things. She can't piece together the murders. She can't solve anything.
And she can't protect the people who died. But with She-ra? Maybe she could.
Maybe she could've swooped in and protected Catra before she suffered all of those injuries before. Adora hesitates--and looks away.]
[because yeah, she heard that. she heard that, Adora!!!]
[the rest of what Adora says settles her, though. not without a tiny feeling of unease in her stomach, but. . . she can push through that. instead of responding verbally, she finds herself pressing her shoulder against Adora's again in quiet camaraderie]
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[finally, there seems to be something Catra can do in return]
[she scoots a little closer to Adora, close enough that her tail brushes up against Adora's back]
You protected me. And not-- I don't mean when you fought off Horde Prime's ships.
I mean. . . [what does she mean???]
no subject
... What... do you mean?
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I mean-- you know. Like. . . [WORDS, CATRA. USE THEM] I've done a lot of stuff I'm not. . . [a pause] I hurt a lot of people. I hurt you. I can't run from that, and I promise I'm not going to try.
But you still never gave up on me.
[her fingers curl into the fabric of her leggings]
If you had, I don't know where I'd be right now. So it's just. . .
[trailing off again!!]
no subject
Catra's words are soft and stilted and stammering, but they're honest, her honest feelings, and there's something in Adora's heart that beats extra to that, and a swooping feeling in her stomach that she knows by now means trouble.
She closes her eyes, smiling a little despite herself, and thinks it isn't fair that she's so happy right now, when she doesn't deserve to be. When she hasn't really protected Catra here at all.]
... I'll never, ever give up on you, Catra. That... even if I can't do anything else here, I can promise you that.
You're too important to me. I can't--I don't want to imagine life without you.
no subject
[-- but there is a moment where she's distracted by those words, that promise, that assertion of her importance to Adora, despite everything that's happened. there's a moment where she lifts her gaze, eyes locking with Adora's, taking in those soft features and the curve of that smile and the brightness of that expression]
[she could let herself get lost in it, if she truly wanted to. that fierce gaze that never, ever loses its fire, no matter how difficult things may seem]
[. . .]
[but. . . not now!! that's not for now. she has a mission!!]
What I'm saying is, you don't have to be She-ra to protect people, okay? So.
[SO. . .]
no subject
She, Adora, can only do so much. Without She-ra, she's just an ordinary girl who's not very good at a lot of things. She can't piece together the murders. She can't solve anything.
And she can't protect the people who died. But with She-ra? Maybe she could.
Maybe she could've swooped in and protected Catra before she suffered all of those injuries before. Adora hesitates--and looks away.]
... Yeah. I... I'll do my best, anyway.
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I'm serious, Adora. Okay?
You can protect people even without her. You can protect them just by being you.
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... I hope so. [A soft sigh.] Because I don't have her here. So... I have to be able to.
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[. . .]
You take on too much responsibility, you know?
[another tail flick, gaze once again flickering away]
It doesn't always have to be you doing the protecting.
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[That's just said softly, though, almost under her breath, and then Adora sighs.]
... It's okay, Catra. I'm fine. We're both okay... we're both going to make it through this. For now... I think that's enough.
no subject
It doesn't.
[because yeah, she heard that. she heard that, Adora!!!]
[the rest of what Adora says settles her, though. not without a tiny feeling of unease in her stomach, but. . . she can push through that. instead of responding verbally, she finds herself pressing her shoulder against Adora's again in quiet camaraderie]