A longer silence, this time, but this one is much heavier. Unseen from the way they’re tucked into his sleeves, his fingers curl—but only loosely, so as not to agitate his injuries.
There’s not really a non-serious answer he could possibly give right now, but she said “don’t get sappy”, so...
[. . . oh no. did she accidentally stumble onto something serious?? that answer-- the pause beforehand, the way LWJ tenses-- gets her to tense up a little bit uncertainly. she isn't very good at being emotionally supportive]
[If nothing else, he doesn’t seem to expect any support or condolences. Whether that’s because it’s her, specifically, or because Lan Wangji is just a stoic loner type in general, is a mystery. (It’s not, it’s the second one.)
His voice is even, and his face is as calm as ever, but there’s a definite air of melancholy about him anyway.]
...By order of the Qishan Wen sect. [It would have been better, he thinks, if the Wens had simply burned it down themselves--forcing his people to destroy their own home had been...
It's not something he would bring up himself, or elaborate on--but since the topic has already been touched on, he can't quite stop himself from clarifying a little more.] Refusal was not tolerated.
[He doesn't want her to misunderstand, and think it was a willing act, when it wasn't.]
[she hadn't realized what he had meant about his sect being burned down until this moment, when he says some other sect had given the order for it. it's then that she bristles, her teeth clenching as she lets out a snarl, almost offended on his behalf]
Wait, so some jerks made you guys burn it down? And you couldn't just tell them to shove it and refuse?
...Preservation of lives must take precedence over individual defiance.
[If it had only been him, perhaps he would’ve held out, he means—but he couldn’t risk other lives out of further stubbornness. It would’ve accomplished nothing to lose his own, anyway.]
I do not wish to see them suffer. [Like, he wants them gone. They’re going to have to die to prevent further tyranny, and Lan Wangji understands that. But… hm. Maybe it’s better to say—] I would not see anyone I care for become tormentors like them.
...The Gusu Lan sect was built around the principle "be righteous". [The Rule Of Rules, really. All the rest of their 3,000 rules stem from that base idea.] Righteousness cannot stem from anger and hatred. A house built on rotten wood will crumble.
[He inclines his head slightly, acknowledging that. Indeed, that’s surely part of the reason his clan has so many rules—after all, if such things came easily, there would be no need to spend lifetimes studying them. There would be no need for cultivators at all.]
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A longer silence, this time, but this one is much heavier. Unseen from the way they’re tucked into his sleeves, his fingers curl—but only loosely, so as not to agitate his injuries.
There’s not really a non-serious answer he could possibly give right now, but she said “don’t get sappy”, so...
Eventually, quietly—]
...I would like to rebuild my sect.
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Oh.
. . . uh. . .
[a beat]
What happened to it?
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His voice is even, and his face is as calm as ever, but there’s a definite air of melancholy about him anyway.]
It was burned down.
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By who?
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...By order of the Qishan Wen sect. [It would have been better, he thinks, if the Wens had simply burned it down themselves--forcing his people to destroy their own home had been...
It's not something he would bring up himself, or elaborate on--but since the topic has already been touched on, he can't quite stop himself from clarifying a little more.] Refusal was not tolerated.
[He doesn't want her to misunderstand, and think it was a willing act, when it wasn't.]
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Wait, so some jerks made you guys burn it down? And you couldn't just tell them to shove it and refuse?
[SHE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND!!]
Why not?!
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He doesn't say anything out loud, but--does he have to, with such a clear implication?]
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[her eyes narrow]
The strong will always try to crush the weak. No matter what the weak do to fight back.
[. . .]
. . . it sounds rough. What you went through.
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[A soft sigh.]
...Preservation of lives must take precedence over individual defiance.
[If it had only been him, perhaps he would’ve held out, he means—but he couldn’t risk other lives out of further stubbornness. It would’ve accomplished nothing to lose his own, anyway.]
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Do you plan on getting revenge?
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[It's against the rules, for one thing--but Lan Wangji isn't a vengeful person to begin with.
That said--]
...I would see them brought to justice someday. [If that's even possible.] Too many clans have suffered similar fates.
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[lol what is justice that isn't delivered by your own hand]
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[Not in this case, anyway. Not to him.
Because despite everything—]
I do not wish to see them suffer. [Like, he wants them gone. They’re going to have to die to prevent further tyranny, and Lan Wangji understands that. But… hm. Maybe it’s better to say—] I would not see anyone I care for become tormentors like them.
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[perhaps this is something she just can't understand]
. . . but it's your battle, I guess. You should approach it however you want to.
[she had asked him about it due to the task, and then gotten a little invested, but. . . otherwise? she has no horse in this race]
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[she admits a little quietly]
Anyone can say something is righteous if they believe it enough.
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What does it mean for you?
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. . .
I don't know.
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It can be very personal.