[But if she ignores it, Adora can't ignore the way that she's got something itching to get out, something that she can't keep to herself for much longer--
She clears her throat, presses her lips together, and rubs the back of her head.]
[she doesn't know why! she just likes them!! . . . it's cuz she can sip on them ironically when talking to people]
Spring's, actually. The others aren't bad, but Spring's is the best.
[anyway Catra is limping pretty heavily still, because walking on this injured leg is not. very. smart of her?? but she does seem to be doing slightly better than she was the previous week immediately after her being injured]
[gives her a flat expression, but! they're at Inside Scoop now, so she guesses?? it'll wait?? until after they order??]
[. . . the flat expression is melting a bit as she turns to do just that, tail flicking behind her as her features melt into something softer. a little more fond??]
[... She'll take that. She's still afraid that if she talks, what'll come out are all of those feelings she's been keeping pent up for all of this time, so she just makes a face in return, before she focuses on ordering.
It's only when they're at a table, tucked away from prying eyes, that she can finally consider saying anything.
But now that she's here... she just stares down at her smoothie, lips pressed together. This... this is actually very scary! She trusts Catra, trusts her with her life, but...
[ordering the smoothies and choosing a place to sit occurs without issue, but. . . Adora isn't the only one who feels like she's bursting to the seams with things unsaid. things that, for some reason, feel so close to the tip of Catra's tongue, like if she opens her mouth to say literally anything at all the words will fall out before she can stop them. they've always been there, niggling at the back of her brain, sending her heart pounding in her ears and her blood rushing to her cheeks. but she always felt so in control of them before!1 like. . . she knew better than to say them, when things were still so freshly repaired. so fragile. so. . . new]
[so when they sit. . . Catra fidgets a little bit as well, tail lashing back and forth behind her as she runs her claws across the edge of her smoothie glass. despite her obvious own set of nerves, she keeps her expression cool and calm, a smile still tugging at her lips]
[. . .]
. . .
[anyway all this manifests in her kind of staring at Adora now, good job Catra]
Adora's always been bad at sitting still; she's extra bad at it when she feels like she's going to explode if she doesn't say the words at the tip of her tongue, and even more so when Catra is staring at her with that smirk on her face.
[COUGH HACK CHOKE WHEEZE SHE'S DYING-- no okay she's fine, she just has to take a moment to catch her breath. her ribs are still injured so this choking thing is no doing her any favors, and when she speaks, her voice is a little raspy??]
I'm-- fine!
[breathe, Catra! breathe! breathe through the way your heart drowns out literally every single sound in this cafeteria!!]
W. . . [it takes her a moment, but when she can formulate full sentences again, she does]
This... is even harder to share than Adora's affection for Catra. This... digs deeply into her insecurities, in a way that she never wanted to see the light of day.
But whatever's keeping her tongue loose isn't done with her yet, and so she can't seem to help but pour out her feelings, eyes squeezed shut in equal bits mortification and frustration.]
I--don't deserve to feel this way about you. I know that I don't. So... I'm sorry.
After everything that I've done to you, after all of the ways I've hurt you... I'm still dumping these feelings on you.
And--even though I have to be She-ra, and I can't focus on things like this, I'm still...!
[... Still, she feels this way.
Still, she's telling Catra, and forcing her to hold some of that burden.]
[Adora, hopelessly and wholeheartedly dedicated to her mission. Adora, the hero, the chosen one, the one who would always go willingly into her destiny. Adora, who followed her heart wherever it led, dragging everyone who cared for her in its wake]
[. . . sometime in a way that still stung. that still brings up feelings of betrayal and abandonment, echoes of the fear tattoo that graced her back just the other week. the pounding in her ears, the light butterflies in her stomach. . . they fade a bit, and her fingers curl tightly around her smoothie glass]
. . . you "can't?"
[she echoes, voice quiet but tense. the rest of it matters, but in this moment, not as much as that one word does. can't.]
You. . . tell me something like this, and then say-- because of She-ra-- that you can't?
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[she yanks the dunce hat off of her head with her free hand]
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Are... are you okay?
Where did that even come from?
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I don't know! It's like the stupid one Dimitri had. Anyway, just--
[breathe, Catra. breeeeeathe]
Just. . . ignore it.
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She clears her throat, presses her lips together, and rubs the back of her head.]
Okay. I'll... uh, I'll try.
... So...
[SOOO...
ask her on the date, adora]
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[clears her throat as well, putting on an air of nonchalance because she is CATRA and she is VERY COOL]
[(lol)]
Sooooooo.
How about breakfast??
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Why does this feel so exciting.
They always eat breakfast together.
Ahem.]
Great! I mean. Yeah. That sounds... sounds great. Let's do it.
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Let's see what the cafeteria has in store for us! Something way better than what they served in the Horde, right?
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Yeah, literally everything here is better than what they gave us in the Horde.
You got any favorites yet?
[Time to head towards the cafeteria!! With Adora supporting her still recovering not-girlfriend as much as she'll allow, naturally.]
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[she doesn't know why! she just likes them!! . . . it's cuz she can sip on them ironically when talking to people]
Spring's, actually. The others aren't bad, but Spring's is the best.
[anyway Catra is limping pretty heavily still, because walking on this injured leg is not. very. smart of her?? but she does seem to be doing slightly better than she was the previous week immediately after her being injured]
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Maybe that's why Spring's winning. Because you keep buying their smoothies.
[She does not actually think that, she's teasing.]
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Yeah, I highly doubt that. You know the overall winner of this dumb "dorm wars" thing doesn't matter to me, anyway.
[though she is trying b/c Viola wants to win, so!]
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[The only thing that matters is getting out of here in one piece and getting home.
(And saving everyone else).]
Soooo...
[.......... spit it out, Adora.]
No, never mind, it should wait for smoothies. Breakfast smoothies.
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Sooooooo. . . what? I'd ask if you're not hungry, but you're never not hungry.
[SHE KNOWS HOW ADORA IS]
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And then makes elaborate hand gestures that kind of translate to:
SMOOTHIES FIRST.]
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[gives her a flat expression, but! they're at Inside Scoop now, so she guesses?? it'll wait?? until after they order??]
[. . . the flat expression is melting a bit as she turns to do just that, tail flicking behind her as her features melt into something softer. a little more fond??]
You're so weird.
[IT'S NOT AN INSULT]
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It's only when they're at a table, tucked away from prying eyes, that she can finally consider saying anything.
But now that she's here... she just stares down at her smoothie, lips pressed together. This... this is actually very scary! She trusts Catra, trusts her with her life, but...
She's never said any of this to anyone.]
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[so when they sit. . . Catra fidgets a little bit as well, tail lashing back and forth behind her as she runs her claws across the edge of her smoothie glass. despite her obvious own set of nerves, she keeps her expression cool and calm, a smile still tugging at her lips]
[. . .]
. . .
[anyway all this manifests in her kind of staring at Adora now, good job Catra]
[1/2]
Adora's always been bad at sitting still; she's extra bad at it when she feels like she's going to explode if she doesn't say the words at the tip of her tongue, and even more so when Catra is staring at her with that smirk on her face.
... ... .... Mmmmmmmmmrrrrr.
Mmmmmmmrrrrrrrrrr.
.........]
Augh! Okay! I can't take it anymore!
[2/3 jk]
[Adora leans in, cheeks flushed, but expression blazingly, fiercely serious.]
I really--really...!
I want to-- I mean, I've been keeping this from you which isn't fair at all but it didn't seem fair to tell you so...!
[3/3]
She takes a deep breath.
Lets it out.
And in a rush:]
I really, really care about you. So much more than just--just as a friend. You're so much more important to me than I could ever say and I just...!
I'm sorry.
[wait what]
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[immediately chokes on her smoothie]
[listen i know what kind of romance cal likes. it's this kind of romance. it is. i promise you]
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Catra?! Are you okay?
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I'm-- fine!
[breathe, Catra! breathe! breathe through the way your heart drowns out literally every single sound in this cafeteria!!]
W. . . [it takes her a moment, but when she can formulate full sentences again, she does]
What do you mean-- you're sorry??
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This... is even harder to share than Adora's affection for Catra. This... digs deeply into her insecurities, in a way that she never wanted to see the light of day.
But whatever's keeping her tongue loose isn't done with her yet, and so she can't seem to help but pour out her feelings, eyes squeezed shut in equal bits mortification and frustration.]
I--don't deserve to feel this way about you. I know that I don't. So... I'm sorry.
After everything that I've done to you, after all of the ways I've hurt you... I'm still dumping these feelings on you.
And--even though I have to be She-ra, and I can't focus on things like this, I'm still...!
[... Still, she feels this way.
Still, she's telling Catra, and forcing her to hold some of that burden.]
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[that tracks, actually]
[Adora, hopelessly and wholeheartedly dedicated to her mission. Adora, the hero, the chosen one, the one who would always go willingly into her destiny. Adora, who followed her heart wherever it led, dragging everyone who cared for her in its wake]
[. . . sometime in a way that still stung. that still brings up feelings of betrayal and abandonment, echoes of the fear tattoo that graced her back just the other week. the pounding in her ears, the light butterflies in her stomach. . . they fade a bit, and her fingers curl tightly around her smoothie glass]
. . . you "can't?"
[she echoes, voice quiet but tense. the rest of it matters, but in this moment, not as much as that one word does. can't.]
You. . . tell me something like this, and then say-- because of She-ra-- that you can't?
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